Wear your heart on your....thumb?? or how I realized I'm blessed...

If I look at my thumb today, nearly a week later, I can still see the ever so faint big ass smiley face on my thumb nail. Well, ok, I can't really see it...its been a week, but honestly, i can still kinda see it. On Monday I was lucky, so lucky, to host a house concert. The 2 singers that came to my house to play were Alexa Wilkinson and Lelia Broussard....MY HOUSE DUDE!!! I was sorta on my own, it was the roomies first day back to school, so she wasnt able to be there that day to help. No worries though, we spent alot of Sunday doing the stuff you must do to prepare for a house concert, which as it turns out is alot of the stuff you do anyways....cleaning up and stuff like that. It was a potluck, I was providing pulled pork(delish, thanks E) and hotdogs, and drinks. I spent the day monday, cleaning and getting the food ready. I was pretty nervous. I had to provide a certain amount of money for the girls and I wasn't sure I'd get enough people here to cover that cost. And honestly i wasn't sure my friends would be appropriate to the artists. I was sure some of them would, but a few, I was worried about. I was also worried that I would not be a good enough host to the artists...yeah, I know.

Fast-forward to that night, the roomie was late, my besties had to drop off the kids and it was starting to get to me. I called Dave, he showed fast, I relaxed a little. That was good. Then my friends started to show, and then the girls showed up and I was in host mode. I have to say, I'm not good at that, at being a host. I went out to help the girls carry in the instruments and introduce myself(see the host obligations). We talked, they were very nice. They had a hotel in Rockford that night, a show in Indy the next day...I know, i don't get it either, so I told them they were welcomed to stay here. Also, I'm not sure how it came up, but I also offered the use of my washer and dryer. They seemed very VERY excited about that, washer and dryer, who woulda thunk, but I guess that's life on the road.

So, I had asked Dave to be the money man. To pay the singers, I was charging $10. That's a deal, I mean, think about if you are going to a concert, how much you'd pay. Not to mention i had the food, and the drinks. All I was asking was $10 and a dish to share. Pretty fair, more than fair I had been told. But, Dave was collecting the money for me, so I could do host stuff. He is good at that stuff, and good for me, good to me. When it was time for the music to start, Dave was the one who got everyone, except a few, to shut up. (S took care of the rest of the talkers).

The music started and I was a ball of nerves again. I was pacing and it wasn't good. As the first song ended, I was out of the room, beer fridge, and I heard something...something that made my heart swell. My friends clapped and cheered so loud!! the funny thing is that i was worried, so worried about that. My friends didn't disappoint. It was like that all night long. Cheering and clapping, i was touched. Lelia and Alexa were touched. I mean I think i was the only person there who was familiar with their work. But my friends clapped after each and every song as if it was their favorite song.

The night went on, the show ended. Most of the people left, and the ones who I had hoped would stay stayed and we all hung out. We ate food(still lots of hotdogs left) drank beer and whiskey and talked and talked. They learned about us, we learned about them,. E and I were drawing our emotions on our thumbs, and a few others joined in. We took our picture, and ill never forget.

The night was great, and I learned things. Things I won't share here, but in the generally speaking, the thing I walked away with was this. I am leading a blessed life. I am blessed with friends(family) who collect money for me, cheer loud when i need them to, pay more than i ask, support the high school band, support me, tell talkers to be quiet, respect me and my guests. They show me they care about me in ways I can't describe, but I will try. Thank you for coming to my party(on a Monday night), thanks for being a great audience to Lelia and Alexa, thanks for hugging me when you left, thanks for putting your arm around me when i looked stressed, thanks for driving far(in construction), thanks for drinking my beer, eating my food, holding my hand. I really wanted a few people to be there, and they were, and they sometimes read this, you know who you are, and thanks for being there....but you're always there...thanks for that too.

After the show, after the clean up, after the morning after, after Alexa and Lelia left, after the dust settled I sent an email to say thanks, and I heard back with an email thanking me...it was funny, but I thought why thank me. I felt great for a few days, riding the wave of an awesome night. I thought what was different about me, nothing really, then I realized, it wasn't what I got from that night that raised me up, it's what I always had, I just finally realized I had it.